Am I a Good Communicator or Not?

Am I a Good Communicator or Not?

I have always considered myself a descent communicator when it comes to work, family, and friends.  I know that I am not the best communicator when it comes to my relationships.  Mainly because I tend to hold things in until I am fed up and there is not much reasoning with me.  In reference to communicating with some of my friends the things that I want to say do not always come out too clear.  I tend to try to “candy coat” certain thoughts that come in my head.  For example when you want to tell your friend that the outfit that she is wearing makes her look fat or it just simply does not flatter her at all.  I want to say it just like I think it.  However not everyone is able to receive criticism in a direct straight forward manner.  In cases like this my message and point is not always received because of the diplomatic manner I try to relay my communication in. 

My boyfriend thinks that I have awful communication skills.  I think one of the main reasons for this is because of our cultural differences.  I also do not think we completely listen to each other.  Which causes the other one to get frustrated.  I guess we can be thankful that we do not have too many situations where it is a huge hindrance on our relationship.  It is something we both recognize and know that we have to work on it.

My family thinks that I am a good communicator.  I think that this is because my immediate family is able to be as blunt as we like with each other.  This way there is no room for any misinterpretation.  This works for us because we do not tend to be too sensitive.  This is just a problem when we are communicating with others.  At least for me it is.

My friends are split.  I think when it comes to my friends; the ones who do not like the things that I have to say are the ones who say that they do not think that I am effective communicator.  However the friends who I mainly seem to agree with or am able to be more direct with say that they think that I am a very effective communicator.

Adapting to different ways to Communicate

Adapting to different ways to Communicate

I think that it is human nature to adapt the way you communicate to fit with different groups and cultures.  A person adapting the way they communicate with different cultures and groups is an effective way to communicate.  A teaching professional would not speak to a child the way they would speak to a child’s parents.

Another good example would be the way many of my company’s marketing and sells department communicates with the associates in the warehouse verses the CFO’s and other executives.  Our sells department wears jeans and have a laid back approach when visiting the warehouses to market a product.  The same sell professionals dress in suits and they take a more formal approach when speaking to the CFO’s and executives. 

The way I speak to my parents differs from the way I speak with my family.  I tend to use more slang and animation when speaking to my friends.  My parents will often get a filtered version of a story verse the story that I will tell my friends.

I will try to apply the platinum rule whenever possible.  I will definitely put great efforts towards putting my shoes in the other person’s shoes.  A person challenging themselves to be learn and understand about different cultures.  This will help them not be guilty of culture myopia.

We are used to adults and children interacting in a certain manner.  In most cases when someone speaks in a manner that is not acceptable it taken in an unpleasant way.

Listen Linda-A little boy tries to convenience his mother to give him a cupcake!

http://pix11.com/2014/03/19/little-boy-who-argued-with-mom-for-cupcakes-gets-major-surprise-from-ellen/#axzz2wkZ7wDy7

How In tuned are you?

How In tuned are you?

The show that I chose to watch was Resurrection.  Based on the characters non-verbal’s the characters in the show seemed happy, sad, concerned, mysterious, and loving.  I would guess that this is a show about a boy who must have ran away or something and finally reunited with his family.  The grandparents seemed very surprised to see the little boy.

When I watch the show with sound I see that I was correct for the most part in regards to the non-verbal.  There are a few things that was present in the story line that I would not have guess just by watching the show without sound and going by their non-verbal’s and gestures.  The boy was killed 32 years ago and all of a sudden showed up on his parents door step who know look old enough to be his grandparents.  You would not be able to tell that most of the people in the story line was related to the boy in some kind of way.  The doctor seemed to be the long lost child’s cousin, and the priest was the child’s childhood friend.  I see that the main concern is how did this boy come back to life, and is it really him?

I chose this show because it is a new show and I thought that it would be hard to have any preconceived notions about it.  My guesses about the non-verbal communication was valid however for the slightly different reasons.  My guess about the emotions being showed was right but the reason based on the story line was not 100%.

If I would have chosen a show like Greys Anatomy I could watch this without the sound and be 90% accurate on what happened in that episode.  This is because I am very familiar with the story line and the characters.   However if someone who was not familiar with the story line would watch Grey's Anatomy without sound would see a variety of emotions being expressed. 

I see that we can be correct when it comes to accessing someone’s mood by their non-verbal’s however it is important not to think you know the whole story.  I think that non-verbal communication will let you know how someone is feeling but not necessarily why.

Model of A Good Communicator!

Model of A Good Communicator

Good communication is key to most successful relationships; rather it be on a professional or personal level.  My senior director is one of the best communicators I know.  He comes straight out and ask you for what he needs.  When you have an issue he listens completely before he responds.  Rodger will take your concern into consideration no matter how small or big your request is.  The key to a good communicator is to give someone your complete attention, good eye contact, encouraging non-verbal gestures, and respect.   

One thing that I can definitely learn from Rodger is to let people finish.  Yes!!!  I can be one of those kind of people.  If someone says something that triggers a thought of my own; I end up interrupting them.  If I am not letting a person finish then I am not giving them a chance to get their whole idea of across.  I am going to strive to let Rodger be more of an influence on me when it comes to effective communication.

Professional Hopes and Goals

Professional Hopes and Goals

My hope and aspirations would be to provide a platform that will give children a good learning foundation no matter their ethnicity, religion, abilities, or non-abilities, or social class.  I will strive for the children who enter any program that I am associated with to see each other as the same.  I do think that it is important to make parents well aware of my program and its goals.  I would hope that this will get more parents on board to supporting my efforts and I will not have as much push back.

I would hope that all early childhood programs abide by the same teachings when it comes to diversity, equity, and social justice.  If we truly want to create a country without social biases we need to all be on the same page.  I do think that childhood professionals should take workshops and confidential assessments to make sure that they aware of their own biases.  Teachers are human too and sometimes need a reminder of their mission and goals.

I would love to thank all of my colleagues for being so engaging and willing to share their very personal stories and experiences.  I do think that we all have had a chance to grow and better ourselves for our present and future journey!